Girl, Speak Louder
Before 8 years old, I was always considered to be a happy apple. My innocent-and-big eyes flashed in class and my bright voice was praised for the symbol-music of the school broadcasting. My childhood was really wonderful, with nothing to fear.
Unfortunately, something happened when I was 8, which charged the whole of my life.
My new head teacher begged father who owed big power for a work of her relative, father carelessly refused and that showed the beginning of my bad luck.
May be she only wanted to let off her anger. Of course, everybody had the right. But she forgot that the person who she gave vent to was just a child-a innocent girl.
Up to now, I never tried to remember what she did to me those days. Scolding or corporal punishment was not important. But the result was obvious. From then on, I could not speak with fluency.
A week later, the doctor told my mother the result. That is my physical ability of speaking was normal, but for a hurt of mentality, I lost my voice. Mother cried her heart out.
A month later, facing to mother’s eager guide, I spoke out a word, which could not be lower. But mother heard it and tears were in her eyes.
There was no innocence or bright voice; I could only speak blurredly, that made all teachers not willing to ask me questions.
A year later, on a new teacher’s arrival, he visited my parents. The first words he asked was-“whether the child has been ill-treated by step parents?”
Friends did not want to play with such a shy girl, even shop keepers did do not want to talk with me to sell their things. –Under warm sunshine, however, my heart was cold like ice.
The big sudden change in my nature made my study-result dropped. I became a shy bad-result student. Even though all the teachers who had praised me before wanted to give me extra lessons for free, but there was no good change.
When I was in Grade Six, there came a new Chinese teacher. In the first lesson, when the teacher was telling the Chinese-delegate, all of us were nervous, included me, though I knew I could not be chosen by the teacher who attached importance to eloquence.
“I choose an honest person, she is so honest that she can’t speak clearly. ”I stayed there, like a skeleton. He let out the platform, and let me make a speech.
I stood up, shyly and said lightly: “Sir, my Chinese result is not good enough.”
He smiled and asked: “What? Could you speak louder?”
I tried to repeat it.
But he seemed unhappy, asked again: “Girl, could you speak louder? And louder!”
All the classmates paid attention to me. The memories came up. –Years ago, I was scolded by that young teacher. I bursted into tears and cried: “Sir, I said my Chinese result was not good enough!”
The teacher turned calm and said to me: “You have courage to speak so loud, but no courage to change the marks?”
I kept stiff, with blood surge forward. The words came up again –speak louder, please.
“Can I make it that shout out the true voice of my life?”
That day, I had an impulse of writing. I wrote an article named “Out Of the Windows”-“The firm glass confined me deeply, I can’t escape. Suddenly, I hear the shout out of the windows”.
From then on, I brought lots of certificates of merit and made great progress. But all of these could not solve my frighten of speaking in common. The wound was so deep, in my heart.
When I was to leave school, the teacher told me to tell study experience to lower-grade students. Looking at the children, I could not say a word.
They were expecting quietly, I tried to say something, in fact. But when the first word came out, no sound.
There were many bright eyes, like mine before. But the more expecting they were, I was much more frighten.
When I did not know what to do, a warm hand came. She was a teacher in the back row –White hair like snow, and deep wrinkles. But all these could not cover her smile. In her thick smile, I saw these words – please speak louder.
I looked at her, a never-seen teacher. Her smile, not laughed at me but a real warm smile from her deep heart.
“Please speak louder, tell those children your view, and speak proudly. You are right.”
In her concerned console, I dried my tears, trying my best to speak every word in my soul –If you are like me, from losing the voice to shouting loud. That shows you can try your best, and exceed yourself!
I poured all the words, but smiled and laughed that I chose wrong listeners. All the children stared their innocent eyes, as if they couldn’t understand what I said.
Suddenly, there came a clear clapping from the teacher who was standing by me and smiling.
Soul in childhood was very weak, and very easy to be hurt. But the wound was often cured by other normal stories.
Ten years later. I stood in the platform and told the stories in English to thousands of people, clapping lasted for long time.
At that moment, there was nothing in my heart except thanks. I waned to thank the two teachers who had ever helped me. In my mind, their silhouette might be blurred, but the words they said to me had already risen to be my most important motto.
If you were I, you can also use it to encourage yourself when you have trouble in doing something, remember the words- “SPEAK LOUDER”.
